5 sure signs you’re dating a narcissist

By Upassna B Singh

New Delhi, January 10 (IANSlife): A narcissist is someone who despises modesty and celebrates vanity. Everything is an inflated and unrealistic mirror of oneself in narcissism. Every narcissist sees themselves as divine, and their deep anxieties and insecurities are clouded by the false notion that they are unique.

The two foundations of narcissism are malignant self-obsession and egocentricity, in which a person does not care about the wishes, needs or interests of others. This type of behavior is associated with personality problems, according to psychologists. The name is derived from the Greek mythological account of Narcissus, a child who fell in love with his own reflection, which dates back to at least AD 8. This tale was proposed by Sigmund Freud as a representation of a self-centered person.

Exaggerated ambition, grandiose fantasy, upright sentiments, and exhibitionism have all been used by psychoanalysts and thinkers throughout history to boost the self-esteem of a narcissist.

Narcissist a good partner?

On paper, narcissists often have it all: a fantastic career, money, success, and attractiveness. All of these awesome exterior features are said to be important in a long-term partner. However, you have to reject this preconceived view, as fantasizing about such a mate can lead you to be on the wrong side of the story. When you’re in a relationship with a narcissist, the dynamics change more subtly. At first, a narcissist begins a ‘love bombardment’ – you are inundated with constant texts, gifts, and compliments, and they show generosity all the way through, but it’s always about their own earnings. other side of the coin.

They try to control you by holding your affection and attention. As your relationship with a narcissistic spouse progresses, you will notice some mysterious characteristics and be disappointed with their sudden change in behavior. This may shock you because you didn’t know that the charismatic charmer you fell in love with initially had narcissistic personality traits. In most cases, the relationship deteriorates and the level of toxicity increases.

You might be wondering if a narcissist can be a decent companion. Unfortunately, “no” is almost always the answer. Because they are selfish and feel no remorse when they hurt their relationship, narcissism is a difficult tendency to change, and this trait makes them hard to be around.

But what if you’re already in a relationship with one of them? If you find yourself justifying the toxicity and behavior of your partner, you are most likely in a narcissistic relationship. You need to look for those undeniable signals that can help you uncover your partner’s hidden personality.

These 5 signs should help you spot red flags:

Take Control of the Conversation – Although relationships are two-way, people tend to pull the conversation back to themselves. They like to be the center of attention and lead the conversation. They don’t pay attention to their partners and tend to interrupt them in the middle of a conversation to share their own views or completely change the topic of the conversation, which is heavily focused on them.

Lack of empathy – Narcissism is characterized by a lack of empathy. There is no affection or true love. It can be difficult to get their attention and get them to care about your feelings and desires. The urge to protect themselves weakens narcissists, which creates a barrier between them and their relationship. They lack genuine compassion when it comes to recognizing and considering their partner’s feelings.

They enlighten you – A narcissist uses this method to deceive their partner’s view of reality. Gaslighting is a type of narcissism in which the person focuses on gaining power over their relationship. Being in a relationship with a narcissist can make you feel insecure, and you may find yourself apologizing for things you haven’t done.

Superiority Complex – A superiority complex is the over-inflated ego of a narcissist combined with a willingness to belittle or undermine others in order to make themselves feel better. A narcissist will not care about the feelings of others. It’s a telltale sign that your partner is a narcissist if they start to feel, behave, and talk like they’re superior to you.

(Upassna B Singh is a life coach and mentor)

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